Out in the field at Parris Island, S.C., I was starving when the drill instructor asked me, "Hey, Rosie, do you want some crackers and jam?"

"Sir, yes, sir!" I said. I would have eaten anything at that point.

"Good. Crack your knuckles and jam them up your ass," he said.

I almost died laughing and doing mountain-climbers for God only knows how long.